Fish That Never Even Left The Dating Pool....

Before writing another entry on another date, I thought I'd blog about some of the hilarious and not-so-hilarious chat-up lines I've received from guys via online dating sites.

When I decided to join a dating site to get back into the world of dating, a lot of friends warned me about the dodgy messages I was likely to receive. If I'm honest, I assumed they were just being over-protective or over-sensitive....how wrong could I be?

 I've received literally hundreds (not exaggerating!) of undesired messages from guys, aged from 16(!) to 58(!), also ranging from a simple 'Hello!' (imaginative first message from the 16 year old...) to 'Hi. Can I ask would you be up for helping an older man with a harmless little fantasy? It's nothing really bad and you don't even have to take your clothes off (unless you want to!)' (from a 58 year old man).

 If any of these guys were what I was looking for, or attractive in either personality or looks, I might be flattered or at least intrigued; but nope, sadly none of these men have been fish I'd want to take out of the dating pool! I really think they should change their first-message approach on an online dating site, especially when other first messages I've received from some of these guys have included:

'You're fit. Want to come round to my flat tonight?'

 'Ur boobs look huge. How big r they?'

 'Are you on here to meet up for sex...with me? ;)'

'Can I send you a pic of my ****?'

'I want to put my face between your butt cheeks.'

I've got to admit, despite not wanting to respond to any of these messages, they did make me laugh....A LOT (hence why I'm blogging about them).

And, last but not least, there are those who like to keep things extra short and sweet and just get straight to the point, like this guy who simply typed:

 

'Anal?'

 

What a group of charmers!
1940s Girl x

P.S. My next blog entry will reveal some of the lovely messages I've received from guys online, just to show they're not all only after one thing or great at writing highly-inappropriate first messages :P

Date 1: Perform the feeling of 'nervousness'.

 

At the end of March I had my first date with a guy I'd met through online dating....

On the day we met I had the usual first date nerves, with some added nerves as I'd never met up with a guy I'd met online before. It's surprising what made me feel nervous though...I've obviously had dates and boyfriends before, but never with someone I've not met before in person, so I felt nervous not knowing how tall the guy was, how he walked and moved, his mannerisms and just how he interacted in day to day life really. It's hard to explain, but not knowing these intricate details of a person's behaviour and character, did increase the nerves!!

When we met up in person, thankfully neither of us seemed that outwardly nervous and there were no awkward silences (which are my least favourite part of first dates - there's nothing more uncomfortable than a good, long, painful silence), so both of us seemed pretty comfortable about the whole first date situation; or so I thought....

After chatting for a bit we decided to go for dinner, the classic, first-date scenario. Oh God, even just thinking about it now makes me feel uncomfortable. We sat down, and after ordering our drinks and waiting for our food, it literally felt like the date had become an audition which the guy in question had responded to, and I was the director who had asked him to 'portray the sensation of feeling nervous'. If this had been the case, if I had been the director of a play asking this guy to convey the emotion of nervousness to me, this guy would have got cast in the play without a moment's hesitation. He'd have NAILED that audition. He literally couldn't sit still from the moment we ordered our drinks. He'd move from holding his chin in his hand, to folding his arms, to stretching, to putting his arms behind his head, to picking up the drink and then putting it back down (without taking a sip from it), all in the space of a few seconds, without pausing for breath or to sit still for a moment. It made me feel stressed.

 I've honestly no idea what I did to make this poor guy so nervous. I do wonder if it had something to do with me being 2 and a half years older than him, and I've never dated a younger guy before, but whatever it was, it creeped me out as much as I seemed to be creeping him out.

 Once the food arrived his nerves did thankfully calm down. But still, it kind of made me feel a bit uncomfortable for the rest of the evening, worrying what I'd done to make him so nervous.

 He did text me afterwards saying he'd found me so 'amazing' in person that his nerves had got the better of him (kudos to him for admitting to the nerves!), but aside from the nerves, I decided I didn't really like the idea of being a 'cougar', and I don't think he did either, from how nervous he got!....So, I decided he wasn't my 'lobster' ('Friends' and seafood reference, how apt!) and we should both throw each other back into the dating pool.

 

Onwards and upwards!

1940s girl x

Hello!

Hello and welcome to Fish I've Thrown Back. Your first question upon reaching this blog may well be (and probably should be!) why is it called what it is? Simply because this blog is going to document a year in the world of first dates which are arranged through my use of an online dating site. Lots of friends I've spoken to and things I've read in the media, refer to these dating sites as being another way of reaching all those other 'fish' in the dating pool you wouldn't have met otherwise.

After two not so brilliant dates in the past week, I decided not to see either guy again, and my dad came up with the concept of these two guys being 'fish I'd thrown back into the dating pool'. It was then my mum's idea, after hearing some of the anecdotes from my two dates, to write them down and then blog about them, as they made for some interesting and funny stories. And as online dating has gained so much popularity in recent years I thought her idea was genius, and would be a perfect way of interacting and connecting with and entertaining fellow 20-somethings in the online world without having to date any of you who might be reading this ;)

So here it is....after consciously avoiding the dating scene for a year or so after getting my heart broken, I decided 2014 was the perfect time to get back on it and to try out the infamous world of online dating. I'm going to share my journey with you, and hope that, whether it persuades you to or dissuades you from trying out online dating; you still find it an entertaining read. Thanks for stopping by!


1940s Girl. x